Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
