I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
