His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
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