Are we in a gay sports bar?
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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