Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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