3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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