I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Randomize
