i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
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