im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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