Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Randomize