You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
