that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
