I wanna passion pit in your ass
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
