i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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