hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Randomize
