i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
