My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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