you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Randomize