I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Randomize
