After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
