Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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