I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
