Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
