who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Randomize
