sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
