I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Randomize
