She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Randomize
