i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
the raccoons are back...
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