just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Randomize
