It's like a parade of train wrecks.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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