no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
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