Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
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