I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Your penis caused this!
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
Randomize