yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
