Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize