just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
