Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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