So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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