I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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