Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize