You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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