dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize
