i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Floor bacon is actually really good
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Randomize
