I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize