D3 body, D1 cock
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
