We're facebook friends in real life
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
