can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
