just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
