i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
he was CRYING into my vagina
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize