What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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