u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize